Do you struggle with your relationships?


Photo by Sasha Freemind on Unsplash

How are your Relationships?


Since I was a young girl, I’ve always been fascinated and interested in relationships.


As a teenager, I’ll admit I became a little preoccupied with romantic relationships, but as I became an adult, all relationships came into focus.


How people relate to each other is fascinating to me. I can have two hour phone conversations with my closest friends about our relationships.


As adults, I believe that we if we are not aware and conscious of our behaviour, it’s really easy to slip into old patterns we learned as a child of how relating is/should be.


This of course can cause all kinds of conflict and unhealthy ways of being with others.


The other day, I got to thinking about relationships, and how EVERYTHING in our lives is a relationship.


How we relate to something, is everything.


Our perception and the stories we tell ourselves about something informs how we relate to it.

This could be our relationship anything - our partner, money, the state of politics, our mother, our ability to go after what we really want in life.


This is also true for our homes and the places we inhabit.



Photo by Rustic Vegan on Unsplash


We have a relationship with our environment. It affects us and we create our relationship to it by what we put in, what we put up with, and where our blindspots are.


We can hate it, love it, be indifferent to it.

But it always starts with our perception of it.


If we keep telling ourselves that our partner will never change, and that the relationship is doomed, then we can’t open our minds to the possible ways we might be contributing to the misery of the relationship and what some possible solutions to move forward might be.


If we keep telling ourselves that starting our new venture will never work, then we will probably not take action, therefore creating the “failure” we said would happen and proving ourselves right.


If we keep telling ourselves that our home is a mess, we can’t stand the clutter, and it’s too small, too old, not to our taste, then we’ll probably continue living in the same cycle of being unhappy when at home and not creating the home we really want. Which, from a Feng Shui perspective will start to affect every other area and relationship you have in your life.


I’ll say it again, EVERYTHING in your life is a relationship.


And, the amazing thing about Feng Shui, is that your relationship to every area of your life shows up in the relationship you have to your home.


Are you following me?


Let me explain it this way – your home holds the energy of each area of your life.


In Feng Shui we use something called the Bagua map, which is placed on the floor plan of your home. The Bagua map contains nine sections, related to nine areas of your life: Career, Knowledge & Self-Cultivation, Health & Family, Wealth & Prosperity, Fame & Reputation, Love & Marriage, Children & Creativity and Helpful People & Travel and the Center.


If you are willing to take a look at the relationship you have with your home, you can open your eyes and go even deeper into the physical spaces that are reflecting back to you the different areas of your life, and show you how healthy those relationships really are.


THAT is the magic of Feng Shui.


When we pay attention to the relationship we have with our home and what the pain points are, then we can consciously choose to change them, which in turn will transform our relationships to the different areas of our lives.


So, tell me, how are your relationships?


Next week I’m going to dive into the Bagua map, and give you some deeper insight into what the nine areas mean and how you can start to pay attention to your relationship to them.

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Copyright © 2019 Bre-An Appler Feng Shui

All photos courtesy of Unsplash. Headshots by Bre-An Appler + Terri Hofford Photography